


Messing Up in Both Ways

by anOrangeFruit



Category: Justice League & Justice League Unlimited (Cartoons)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Slow Build, i like batflash, not great at writing romance so bear with me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-11-29 13:57:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11442318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anOrangeFruit/pseuds/anOrangeFruit
Summary: Acts of crime don't pay and unfortunately for Flash, the darling of Central City, acts of heroic deeds don't pay much either.That isn't to say he would turn to crime, but Wally is going to have to pay more attention to maintaining his life.





	1. Left Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm using this as an opportunity to level up my love writing skills.  
> For the first few chapters, you will not see any definite lovey dovey action. Maybe really subtle flirting. ;)  
> I will probably delete the slow build tag later though since I'm kind of throwing up a bunch of these words. Don't know though.
> 
> 7/15/2017: I edited the heck out of chapters 1 and 2. It was like surgery.

Death via sitting on his ass whilst attending a conference.

Amazing.

That sure is the way to go. Nothing like an utterly boring death to his superhero career to finish it off with a spectacular ending. He was sure that by the time Bats stopped talking, the table would have to get a funeral of its own with the way his fingers were drilling holes into it.

“Green Lantern, Hawkgirl, there will be multiple air based units guarding the inner entrance. You'll need to bring them as far away as possible from the lab. Remember, they explode on deactivation. Superman--"

Just end me now, Wally pleaded. Well, not necessarily Superman end him, but it would probably be faster. At least he finally got to the roles part.

Batman. Their relationship was weird, to say the least. A flirt here and there from Wally, he didn't think that Batman would act first. Wally didn't think he would do anything at all except stop, stare, and tell him to fuck off. It was a few months after they all shook hands and decided to call themselves the Justice League. His room was dark, Batman's whole body was the shadows (Wally would have been freaked out by the whole stalker in your bedroom thing, but it was kinda hot so...), and then they did 'the thing'. They did 'the thing' about once every month. Not in a relationship, but...fuckbuddies? That word didn't fit with Batman.

Basically, there was no love outside the bedroom. That should have told Wally to feel sad, feel angry. To board up the windows and bolt the door, but…When they did it, Wally could see it. He wasn’t exactly sure what Batman was unintentionally letting him see, but he craved it. He was okay with this thing. Thinking about the L-word made his body feel uncomfortable.  

His stomach gurgled. Superman, please ignore that.

The speedster was pretty sure that he was 90% stomach because he just ate half an hour ago. It must be his nerves or something like that. Would anyone notice if he went to take a quick trip to the kitchen?

“Flash, where do you think you’re going?” asked Batman. Wally had stood up from his chair without realizing it. Cue the bat-glare.

The brand of glare given to him would make a hardcore pro-wrestler wither on the spot. But giant tough guy he was not and Wally cried inside a little.  

“Sit down,” Batman ordered. Wally could hear the " _Now_ " on the tip of the Knight's tongue.

He dumped himself back onto the chair and tried to look nonchalant when Bats demanded an answer with his eyes. With his eyes.

Wally gave his acting skills a passing grade and the effort an A...plus plus. For positive feelings' sake.

Batman was still staring at him and pretty soon the other members of the room started turning their heads to look at him. He smiled cheekily and wiggled his fingers at the onlookers, the digits slightly blurring from the speed put into it. His gloves made an interesting squeaky sound as he moved them. Most of the people sighed at his childish behavior, but Batman continued to burn. Coldly.

“What?” Wally hugged his legs against his chest, “You know I can’t sit still.” The speedster twirled the seat around using his body, slightly mimicking the movement of clothes in a washing machine.

“Pay attention. You’re not dismissed from the meeting until it is finished.” Batman growled. Flash changes his pout into a smirk. “Don’t worry Bats, I’ll always have my eyes on you.” GL was shaking his head in amusement. Score.

Batman looked ready to put him in a coma. “This isn’t a joke. We need every person alert and informed to stay undetected for as long as possible.”

Superman cleared his throat, taking in the brunt force of the Bat-glare. “Batman, I think Flash understands by now. Don’t be so hard on him. He knows what’s going on.”

Wally was hot all over. This was really embarrassing.     

Thankfully for him, Batman continued with debriefing the plan. Trust Superman to interrupt the Bat and survive.The speedster scrunched his eyebrows under the mask and folded his arms over his chest. He didn’t get it. Why force him to attend these meetings when he would just end up with-

“Flash, J’onn, you will both stay back just in case there will be a need for emergency transportation and/or backup.”

Sigh.

It took all of Flash’s willpower not to make himself look like a fool from trying to whine about the placements.

 _This is hardly fair._  He wanted to say. He had protested the role placements before, but Batman always came and cock-blocked him with his freaky boss powers.

His body was fine, injuries healed weeks ago. In fact, all the major ones were gone on the first day. Wally made sure of that. He had super healing. Wally fumed in his seat.

“Does anybody have any questions about the plan?” Superman asked standing up.

Flash raised his hand.

“Great. Everyone prep yourselves. We leave in 25 minutes sharp. Dismissed.” Batman looked at Flash pointedly.

They hadn't done 'the thing' for weeks, not after...Maybe that's why Bats was so grumpy?

Flash stuck out his tongue, then promptly kicked out of his chair and got the hell out of the room.  

... 

You couldn’t really call it a kitchen just like how you couldn’t really call the “Conference Room” a room. They really need to renovate the Watchtower someday in the future. Sooner preferably.

The ugly steel bar was empty with none of the usual kitchen appliances that would cover a normal one, the only exception was a simple coffee maker. Instead of sinks, cool steam filled with cleaning agents were used. Probably to save water. The only occupants of the small room was a large fridge, the usual cupboards that were stuffed with dry food, and Wally.

He was in the middle of slicing off a piece of roundish bread when he felt someone grasp his shoulders firmly, jostling the arm that held the butter knife. “You’re takin' an awfully long time to cut a piece of bread.” John took a closer look at Wally's armed hand. "Well, no wonder! Why are you using a butter knife?" Wally dodged the hand that tried to grab the knife.

Flash glared at Green Lantern and shook the blunt knife at him. “Watch it, man, you ruin my bread and I'll beat you with this.” Wally went back to attacking the partially cut bread. “Aren’t you supposed to be fighting ninjas and whatnot?”

GL chuckled, “Aren’t you supposed to be watching my ass while I’m fighting ninjas?” He stooped inside the fridge to grab a water bottle.

Touché.

“I have the power to moonwalk backwards into the monitor station while taking a nice long dip in the steam room at the same time. So how about that?” Wally said, using his speed to duck under John, nimble fingers snagging a stack of lettuce and ham from the fridge to slap it on his carefully cut bread.

John turned to him and cocked an eyebrow. “You can moonwalk?”

"You don't believe me?" John shrugged and put back his drink besides the other unfinished bottles. It was an army in there. Wally wondered if some of them were his. Aquaman would probably sneer at the collection and make a comment about wasteful humans and their self-destructing tendencies.

Green Lantern leaned against the counter and stared at the monstrosity with open fascination. “That is a lot of ham,” he commented.   

“There’s never enough ham.” Wally squished the top bread onto the stack. “Hey, you wanna see a cool magic trick?” Wally said, facing the marine. The ex-Marine signed in response.

“Can’t stop you.” Wally flashed a wide grin.

“Okay, ready?” Was the short warning. A few seconds later the sandwich that lay on the countertop disappeared. The only proof left that told of its short existence was the few crumbs seen on the side of his lips. “Kadabra.” He gave a small burp as the finisher.

The expression that was given to Flash wasn’t exactly audience approval level, but it wasn’t unhappy, so he took it.

Green Lantern gave a heavy sigh.“We need to talk.” Least favorite sentence to ever grace his ears. 

“Well, this was fun and all, but...bye.“

“Wait!” Green Lantern semi-shouted. Wally was already at the door. He tilted his head to look at the man.

“Yeah? What ya need?” Wally asked, bouncing on his heels. He was itching to run a few rounds inside the Watchtower. To run the irritation away.

“About the past missions-” The speedster narrowed his eyes. He didn’t need this discussion before monitor duty. It would just make the experience sourer than it already should be.

“I’m not going to talk about this.” Before he could speed away, a pair of hands found a home on his shoulders and gripped hard, with enough pressure to cross into borderline uncomfortable.

Great.

“Wait, Flash! Hold on. Just hear me out, okay?” The Marine said roughly, slightly out of breath from the short distance he had to run not to mention the bitter surprise that Flash gave him from leaving him so quickly.

Wally sighed and shrugged out of the grip to face his friend. He looked persistent. Might as well get it done with sooner so he wouldn’t have to deal with it later.

John, seeing as he had most of the speedster’s full, but short attention, began.

“Look, I know that it seems like we are keeping you out of higher level missions for unfair reasons, but it’s nothing like that.” He frowned. “You remember the mission from two weeks ago, right?”

Wally did remember. The mission took place in an ammunitions factory, a theft was being staged for some particularly large explosives. Martian and Hawkgirl stayed behind with Batman because of the fire risks. 

There were hostages held up on the upper level of the building. He was tasked with bringing them as far away from the factory as possible. He remembered thinking that the whole deal was slightly suspicious with the lack of enemies but shook it off believing instead it was just nerves that were messing with him.

Flash mistook the last occupant of the room as a hostage and was immediately thrown through the thick wall as a result of his entire body having intimate, wild sex with a fiery explosion.

His last moments before unconsciousness was getting slammed against chunks of concrete and glass and then bouncing three times off the hard ground from the force.

It hurt like a massive bitch.

Moral of the story: Check to see if your rescuee looks like they want to explode you.

Surprisingly, he was still aching in some parts from where pieces of glass really dug in. Maybe some bits of glass was stuck in there? Wally wondered how bad it would have felt without his fast healing.

He grimaced at the thought. “Yeah, I remember, but I’m all healed up now. Docter J'onn and Nurse Bats said I was good to go and stretch my legs. Why keep me away, huh?”

Green Lantern looked at him with pity. That was not an expression Wally was going to let slide by. “You almost entirely shattered your pelvis and hip bones. You couldn’t even walk-”

“Nope. Sorry. A reason like “because we care” is not a reason I’m going to accept.” Wally jabbed a finger into Lantern’s chest. “I’m healed. I’m fine. You got it? Understando? Sure, the first day I couldn’t walk right, yeah, but I could still walk. It's called super healing, John, super healing. I’m not human. You should know that as well.”

John winced. Wally regretted his wording.

“I-I mean, you know, not human in that…” He didn’t know what to say. Wally’s whole body burned from embarrassment and guilt.

“I know.” Lantern’s face was like a statue.

Wally looked down. He didn't like those kinds of faces. “I…sorry.” The heat in his body grew cold. Why was he so...this today?

John closed his eyes and shook his head. “No, you’re right. You’re fit to go. In fact, you’re probably in a better state than any of us right now. This is Batman’s decision though and as unfair and seemingly wrong as his reasons may be, he’s doing this for a very, very good reason.” 

What was Bats' problem? But...

Wally relaxed. Green Lantern wasn't mad at him entirely. “Know the reason?”

“No.”

Wally tried to blow at the invisible strands of hair in his eyes. “So?”

Green Lantern hesitated before patting his shoulders. “It means you’re gonna have to wait awhile before you can bust out your legs for the bigger enemies, sport. Besides, who knows? Maybe we'll mess up and you can come save the day.”

Wally swatted off the unwanted hand. It's been so long since he was a kid. “It’s already been awhile enough. I can take care of myself without needing anybody else’s help.” He said, fully aware of how much he sounded like a child. “I’ve done it for years.”

“Flash, I kno-” Wally cut him off.

“You know, he’d throw every single one of our lives away, including his, and still believe that it was all for a good reason. He's that kinda guy.”

John then felt a blast of wind hit his face as Flash promptly zoomed off into who knows where. John felt kind of depressed.

“I was trying to give a motivational speech dammit. I could have spent these thirty minutes with Hawkgirl instead of trying to lift up your ass,” John yelled after the speedster, and then immediately blushed from his words, hoping that no one else had heard. Big chance.

Grumbles left the ex-marine's mouth as he stomped back to the fridge to drink the rest of the half empty bottle.

...

Time sure does goes slow when you happen to be an insanely fast human.

Wally swung his legs off from the steel crate, the back of his feet bumping softly against the hard surface, creating an uneven drumming sound. His limbs strangely ached after his seventeen laps of running all over the place. It wasn't painful though. Wally just needed to check if he could actually run without a hitch. He should talk to Batman after this mission was over. Face to face.

“Flash, you okay?” Hawkgirl asked as she approached his right.

Strange of Shayera Hol of all people to ask. 

“What would I say?” Wally wasn’t looking at her, he instead watched the stars do nothing. It was boring, but it was better than wasting energy.

Shayera looked up at him with confusion.

The question confused her. Maybe it was the wording.

She observed Flash from under her mask. His body was still, gazing at the nothingness of space. The whole scene seemed poetic.

Strange of Flash to try and shake away from other people’s attention.

Flash had acted strangely during the last conference, granted he was recovering from the nasty fall he received from the mission that had occurred a couple of weeks back. The meeting was devoid of the speedster's usual antics and she found it to be dull (not that she would ever tell him that, it would take weeks before he stopped bouncing off walls).

She wouldn’t admit it verbally, but she was scared for Flash. She knew that the Flash could bounce back from worse injuries, but to see the state that half his body was in… Gruesome.

Any pieces of glass and rubble were immediately removed from the flesh. The thin suit that hugged the man's body did a poor job in protecting him from the explosive heat. Streaks of painful burns painted the young man's skin and the scent of charred corpse and hair hung around him. A truly unfamiliar scent to be associated with the bright-eyed speedster that usually smelled like cheap soap and heavily buttered cookies. She knew that if she had looked down back then, she would be treated to the sight of bone teasingly hiding against burnt meat.

He was awake. She had asked him if he was okay. He said something about fires and putting his genitals in them.

The x-rays did no better in softening the situation. It was a wonder how his bones could be mended so easily. She remembered holding him down along with the Kryptonian as Batman broke his left leg. They were healing strangely.  Her stomach slightly turned from the memory. Humans were very breakable.

She shook her head mentally. Flash was alright and it wouldn’t be soon before she could see him speeding across distances.

Shayera turned away from the boyish man. She didn’t have time for this now, maybe later. “Just checking up on you. You were acting strangely during the meeting.” She could feel Flash stare at her as she walked away to get ready for takeoff.

Hawkgirl? Just checking up on him? He needed to check if the Earth was still intact. At this rate, Superman and Wonder Princess are going to come along with chocolates in one hand and a parade of "Get Well Soon" balloons in the other. He knew they all meant well, but... Wally's irritation turned to guilt. He was basically being a dick. An asshole.

"Wow Flashster, you're such a great guy thinking about your friends like this," he muttered under his breath.

Flash then leaped from the large crate he was stupidly brooding on and sped up to the small monitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Criticisms are like the bricks to my path of not sounding horrible. Yes, please.  
> Suggestions would be nice too.


	2. Sneaking Noticed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Acts of crime don't pay and unfortunately for Flash, the darling of Central City, acts of heroic deeds don't pay much either.  
> That isn't to say he would turn to crime, but Wally is going to have to pay more attention to maintaining his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brucie and Wally get roped up in a sticky situation

“Stay,” said the Martian.

"No," said the Speedster. In his head. After the Martian left his sight.

Wally smiled. An opportunity had arisen and the Flash was not going to let it go. He would have to wait for J’onn to start up the engine.

They were not leaving him here stranded on an empty space station with nothing to do. Flash doesn't do sit still. He might as well have just stayed behind in Central City chasing bad guys and getting ready for his upcoming interview.  

Batman was in a funk and it was preventing Flash from doing his job. If this didn’t work out, then he could depend on Superman or Wonder Woman or anyone crazy enough to slap some sense into the Bat. Well...maybe not slap, but nag?

With that final thought, Wally nodded to himself, determined to see this through and disappeared.

...

A camera recorded a Javelin unit closing its hatch and leaving the bay. It barely caught the red streak that seemed to merge with the spacecraft.

...

J’onn wanted to sigh. He didn’t dare read the minds of the other League members, not without consent from them or another friend. Their trust in him was great and to be cherished.

That didn’t mean he couldn’t feel their presence, their feelings. Flash the loudest out of all of them. The mind of the fast human was impenetrable to a careless touch, it spun too fast for the alien. But Flash’s mind was very open, it was hard not to hear the stray thoughts that leaked out of the boy’s pores whizzing around his head like the comet does to a star.

The boy was nestled between the inner walls of the ship and the docking hatch, positioned so that he was behind J’onn’s broad back and in the estimated area of a human’s blind spot. It would have worked on--well no it wouldn’t have worked on any other League member and it definitely won’t work on him.

J’onn thought about opening the door to surprise Flash but immediately decided against it.

“Flash come out from there and sit down,” he could feel the human freeze in alarm, “It isn’t recommended to be out of a chair while a vehicle is in motion.” Flash was suddenly sitting next to him.

“You’re not going to kick me out? Scold me? I did enter behind your back,” the speedster said grinning, not sounding sorry at all.

They were entering the earth’s denser atmosphere. “You would be falling 200 miles from the ground. It wouldn’t be very kind.” Flash gave an airy laugh, somehow finding the statement humorous.

“You know I can run on clouds, right?” J’onn couldn’t see how that would work since the current collection of molecules in this atmosphere was thin, but he didn’t think too deeply about it.

In the corner of his eye, he saw Flash lean back and put his feet alarmingly close to the controls. “Well, I guess we’ll have to do the backup thingy together.” J’onn wondered how Batman would react to this situation. It probably wouldn’t be a very positive reaction.

...

He couldn’t help but put in a little extra skip in his steps. Flash thought he would have to bring a heartwarming speech to convince J’onn J’onzz of all people to let him stay on the mission. 

As Flash and J’onn neared the sewage system, they could already hear the sounds of fighting and bodies hitting the floor. Flash felt the vibrations of an especially good hit making its mark under his feet. Probably Superman winning things.

“I’ll check to see if it’s safe to enter in,” the Martian said while dissipating his molecules to phase through the solid stone.

“You do that. I’m going to use the element of surprise.” Flash said, and then vibrated through the floor before Martian could do anything. The phasing created a slight explosion which resulted in a medium sized hole. J'onn used it to enter in the sewer.

Flash landed on his feet and a few seconds later, Superman along with a wrecking ball (?) came crashing into the concrete wall beside him. The super alien didn't so much as grunt as he threw the steel ball aside, separating the rope that was attached to it. He then jumped heavily onto his feet, the force creating cracks underneath them as he landed.

The Kryptonian kneaded his temple and glared at Wally. “I didn't want to believe it was you who was crashing through the ceiling, but here you are.” Superman reflected a large ball with the swat of his hand. He glanced at J'onn who then went to take care of the remaining machines.

"You're supposed to be guarding the station. What are you doing here, Flash?" The last word caught the attention of one seriously pissed bat.

The speedster put his hands on his hip and smiled. “Well, we heard your cry for help, so we came to give it,” said Flash, his grin threatening to blind any who dare look directly at it. Flash looked over to J'onn and the attacking robots, most of them offline with Superman’s handy work. It was kind of a strange decision for them to shoot wrecking balls. Though it would be effective against normal humans that happen to stumble across this sewer.

“Flash is there?” asked Green Lantern. Superman could hear the slight strain in the other super hero’s words. “Tell him to come over to my position, I’m kind of in a beam vs beam situation with a giant clown that’s shooting lasers out of its mouth.”

Flash smirked. “Don’t worry Green Flashlight, help is galloping your way,” Flash said as he left the two aliens and sped through the robots that struggled to catch his movements.

"Someday he's going to get himself really hurt," Superman said after a few moments.

...

Batman gritted his teeth. Flash wasn't responding to any of his calls. Superman was hovering back and forth while looking at him with his worried mother look. "Batman, I've already checked. Triple-checked with x-ray. He's not in the sewers anymore. Someone must of--"

"Find J’onn and check the lab, it’s shielded with lead." He couldn't think, not with Superman was hanging over him and ignoring his orders.

"I've--"

"Check. Again."

Superman sighed, or really blew a gust out of his nose, making Batman's cape flap. As he flew back into one of the corridors, he glanced at the man. Superman relaxed his fists and shook his head in exasperation. Batman always needed to work things alone.

Batman was alone. This was great. He walked past the clown shaped machines of destruction. What was Joker trying to gain by protecting some data chips?

He froze.

"What is it, Batman? You found a lead?"

"Superman if you hear anything happen to me, don't follow, you hear me? Don't. Not if you want to lose Flash."

"Ah, so you did find a--" Batman cut off the link and continued walking.

…

There.

"Harleen."

"Hello, Batsy. It's been so long. Or, in my good opinion, not long enough." She was leaning her arms on the handle of her hammer.

"Where’s Flash?" Harley smiled.

"Hmm, yeah. Did ya notice my new bracelet? Lexy gave to me as a gift. It's both fashionable  _and_  x-ray proof." Harley Quinn shook her hand and tossed a jack-in-the-box with the other. "Think fast!" She yelled after Batman leaned away from the red glove that popped out of the box.

He couldn't completely escape the powder that was thrown at his face.

...

Half naked, blindfolded and upside down. Damn. What was it with hostages and them trying to break every single bone in his body?

How was he supposed to know that the lady was actually an insane jester wannabe? Wally thought as he struggled against the seemingly unconscious body and the metal chains that held him in place.

He remembers running towards the source of the high-pitched scream after ripping out every single wire his hands could lay on inside the freaky clown robot. Flash found a familiar looking cute scientist curled up against the grimy walls of a dead-end. He didn’t question how she got here in the first place, Wally just knew he had to help.

She refused to be carried by him and said something about cheating and car sickness.

"Follow me and don't leave my side," Flash said. 

He already turned his head to try to defend against his attacker but wasn't fast enough to dodge the hammer that called for his blood. He never heard a giggle so evil. It put Chuckie to shame by a lot.

The body tied to him jerked as if just waking, the hairs tickling the back of his neck. It made him squeamish.  

“Stop squirming,” the body whispered into his uncovered ears making Flash shiver and wait, did his stomach do a backflip off a building? Wally tried to ignore that situation because holy cow! That gravelly tone most certainly belonged to… Flash was going to cry in an ugly mix of hope and despair.

Why didn't he notice before? He could feel the soft long marks on the bat's back. They haven't...done enough for Wally to remember everything, but he knew that Batman had a ton of scars.

“Bats, err, Batman,” Flash chuckled uneasily, “Good day seeing you here, or well feeling I suppose.” The blindfolds made it really hard to see. Batman was silent for a few seconds before he decided to dump Flash back into the Pit of Despair.

"It seems we've been roped up-"

“I’m not Batman.”

 _Please don't_ , Bruce thought.

“What!” Wally shrieked. “What do you mean you’re not Batman?! You sound just like him and everything. Bats, this is not funny at all--”

“Please, you need to calm down, struggling won’t help us in this situation,” the man said, suddenly soothing. Okay, so it really wasn’t Batman. Batman didn’t sooth. At least not outside. It would go against the very foundations of the universe. Wally didn’t care right now, he kinda felt scammed.

“Yes, I know this isn’t a laughing matter. But it seems we’re on our own as of now, so we’ll have to figure at how--” Batma--uh, the man suddenly stiffened his entire body.

“How what?” The man didn’t give a response. Wally wondered what happened to make him falter like that when he suddenly realized the ghost of a breath was washing the side of his face. It smelled like licorice and artificial peppermint.

A breathy giggle erupted from the mouth. “On the contrary, Brucie,” a harsh chuckle, “I think it’s quite funny.”

“Joker.” Brucie(?) said calmly.

 _Joker_ , Wally’s mind whispered. He struggled not to quiver, the stories that Nightwing told him starting to envelop his head. He felt something cold and sharp lightly caress his unprotected cheeks and then lift off to presumably touch the other guy. 

“You enjoyed the party gifts I gave you?” The Joker’s pitch changing from guttural to a creepy high. “I got it from a new…friend.”

“Oh? And who might this friend be?” Conversing with the enemy? Great tactic Mister! This person sure is one cool guy. Wally might have done it himself if he wasn’t scared shitless.

“Well, I think they’re a friend of yours too! Chiseled features, obscenely rich, big body. Just a little bit less hair.” Surprisingly, Brucie didn’t flinch as strands of hair curls left his head. The tug made the chains that restrained them slightly sway, making Flash feel sick. His blood rushed faster as a speedster. A reason why Flash favored having both two feet on the ground.

“That friend wishes for you to, well…be missing for a few days, months,  _years_. And as a good friend myself, I’ll be happy to oblige…for now.”

The madman started chuckling deliriously. “Speaking of parties, would you be interested in some candy apples?” The object held in the Joker’s hand prodded the chains which, to a certain extent, stopped its movement.

“I didn’t think you liked to use lemon flavoring as your syrup,” Brucie said calmly. 

“Oh, you must excuse me. It was the only good smelling fruit I had on hand that wouldn’t severely negate the properties of the acid.”

Wally felt his eyes pop open.  _Acid?_

“Oops, did I say acid? How silly of me, I ruined the surprise! What. A. Bummer. I meant to say…no, I really  _did_  mean acid. Ahaha…It’s just so fun watching things melt.” Joker started doing a full-out villainy laugh. This situation was not funny nor was it pleasant. At least Wally waited before phasing out of the chains.

Wally hoped that the sharp noises that were getting louder weren't some overcomplicated contraption designed to kill them in a horrible way. He hadn’t even fully ridden out his prime years.

No, Wally listened closely, were those high heels? …Diana? For some reason, Wally couldn’t feel happiness from the relief that would be flooding his systems. Maybe it was from being upside down for so long. Being a meta-human wasn't without faults. He hadn’t eaten anything since he left the Watchtower.

“Mr. J! Let down yer ear.” A girlish voice whispered. 

“Hey,” Brucie called softly. Wally didn’t need an untrained civilian to play hero.

“Not right now Brucie, we’re kinda in the middle of getting tortured.” Wally quietly shot back. He could hear the other sigh in annoyance. Welp here comes another person hopping on the Flash is a Little Shit Express.

“Shush!” the evil lady said, and then Wally felt the heavy slap of armor leather (probably his suit) against his body and heard it fall down with a  _kerplunk!_  followed by a nice long  _sizzle_  as the material was presumably eaten by the acid. That’s just great.

“Sorry boys, a new development just came up and I’ll have to leave you both unsupervised. I can only  _hope_  that you two don’t escape from your weakly constructed restraints. Just how would my heart ever  _survive_  if it came to that?”

An arm bumped against Wally's ear, reaching for the man shielded by his body. "Don't worry." The words slithered like tar down his spine. "I'll have you to myself later. Just in a different appearance, hopefully." The Joker’s footsteps receded away from them.

“Tata.” the girl giggled and then gave a grunt as she pushed the two victim’s lower (upper?) limbs, leaving them swinging back and forth.

They swung in silence for a minute.

“I think they’re gone.” Wally murmured.

“Mhm.” Was the response.

“So, uh, I think before the um…the Joker came in you had a plan?” Wally asked awkwardly. He didn’t have hope to think that the man’s plan would work, but it would fill the uncomfortable silence with something.

“Yes.” Was all Brucie said before he started shifting his body, heavily Wally might add, as he could feel the slight tremors the chains gave off from the man’s effort. Must be really desperate.

“Hey man, I don’t thin-” Wally choked on his words when Brucie started violently rubbing the back of his head against Wally’s. Laughter bubbled in Wally’s chest but then he cut himself off. This was NOT the time to start laughing, not when they were dangling precariously over a vat of acid. With the way the acid reacted so quickly to the suit, it was not the kind that Wally wanted to touch without dumping a truckload of bleach.

Brucie was turning his head now. Was he trying to catch both of them on fire?

“Woah Brucie! At least take me out on a date before you want to start getting rough. Besides your rubbing the wrong kind of heads.” Wally said while shaking from laughter. Argh. He must be getting lightheaded faster than he thought.

“It’s Bruce, not Brucie. That was just a nickname that The Joker made on the spot. And don’t worry about getting “rough” soon. I’m using the knot of your blindfold to get rid of mine.”

“Oh,” Wally said and giggled. Bruce sounded a lot better than Brucie.

He felt something snag real good against his temporary mask and then fall away from him.

“Can I start rubbing against you now?” asked Wally smirking.

“No, I just need you to swing with me,” said Bruce and Wally could feel him twisting and expanding his chest and shoulders and then relax his body. Something made a sound. Wally's smirk dropped. He was starting to slide down and suddenly the speedster could feel his heart pumping in his throat. No. This was not happening.

“Wait, Bruce, you need to stop. I’m not as wide as you. You’re going to make me fall.” Scared and bossy did not go together. Wally refused to die at the hands of a careless stranger.

“Shh sh, don’t worry. I need to loosen the chains before we can start swinging. I haven’t forgotten about you.” Bruce said, trying to comfort the increasingly panicky man. It kind of worked as the speedster’s heart fell back into his chest.

Bruce started swinging and little by little, Wally started falling. His heart was making its way past his lungs.

“You haven’t told me your name.” Wally struggled to blink against the blindfold, his eyelashes getting caught between the fabric of the strip.

“Wally.” The word was kind of slurred and sounded like how the box robot from that one Pixar movie pronounced its own name. U-wal-ee

Swing.

“It’s unfortunate how we had to meet under these circumstances, Wally. My name is Bruce.”

“Yeah. I heard.” His throat painfully contracted, reminding him how long it had been since he drank. Or ate. Wally stopped getting thick past his chest and he wasn’t too sure if his butt would help prevent him from falling down. Down. Down…

Swing.  _Klink_. The chains banged against something solid. There was probably a catwalk further up. 

“I come from Gotham City.” Why was the guy trying to hold a conversation with the complete stranger tied to his back?

“Central City.”

“You have an occupation?”

The next swing would have made Wally fall if he didn’t cling on to the chains at the last second. He had to push against the other man's back to stay put. Being upside down made him feel sluggish.

“Ooh…” Wally moaned, blood finally affecting his head.

“Wally?”

 _Why are you talking to me?_  He wanted to sob. But he didn't, because that would be embarrassing. Not to mention out of the blue. “No. Going to an interview in three days.” He said instead. 

“It’s-Chemistry!” He managed to gasp out. Wally had to swallow back the bile that seemed to seep past his climbing heart.

The swinging was getting close to 60 degrees.

Why the fuck was this guy doing this? How does swinging back and forth do anything? He wanted to laugh.

“Hey, Bruce?” The smile that plastered onto Wally’s face was shaking. “What if we-What if we spat into the vat?”  _That rhymed._ He gave off an airy laugh. “So that we could dissociate the acid? You know, to alleviate it? Hahaha, get it? Alleviate? Cause breathing acid makes you high.” His voice cracked at the high part.

“Wally? Are you okay?” It sounded like they were both underwater.

Swing.  _Klunk!_ Oh God, that banging.

Wally moaned. He was hot and sweaty. His warm, beating heart was already pressing itself against his lips, its attempts to slip through them were feeble but persistent, and the sickness trudged not too far behind. Black spots pulsed, racing across his eyes like a meteor shower.

“You’re gonna have to do it yourself though…I’m all out of saliva.” Wally couldn’t stop the tears from dripping down his freckled forehead. His recently cut hair wasn’t much of a big help either.

Swing.

Hands firmly grasped his sharp hips. Wally wasn’t able to think too hard about how flexible and strong one had to be to reach that far back.

“Don’t worry, there’s no need for that,” Bruce said, and then relaxed his body.

They hurtled towards the ground and Wally fell asleep.

...

Bruce called the Manor for transportation after he took care of Wally’s sickness. He got the emergency comm link from a pocket hidden in his underwear. Never could be too prepared.

Now, all Bruce had to do was wait.

Bruce examined the prone form at his feet. There were unsurprisingly no scars that could lay claim to the speedster’s skin. His fast healing was to be thanked. Bruce decided that there wasn’t anything that needed serious attention besides the young man’s large metabolism, an unfortunate consequence from the special healing, though Flash might say otherwise.

He scooped up Wally in a fireman's carry and made for an exit.

…

He had to change the position he was carrying Wally after he realized that the speedster got sick from being upside down. The young man felt warm against his bare chest. His body was colder than what Bruce's hands remembered.

“Tim.” Bruce acknowledged.

The teenager peeked outside the window. “Is that…The Flash?”

“Yes.” Bruce opened the car and laid Wally inside, the sleeping form pressing his cheeks against the belt as he was buckled in. Bruce got in, sitting diagonally from Wally.

“Alfred was shopping. I saw him on the way out.” Tim added as the car drove away from the tunnel entrance. Bruce had already pulled out spare clothing and a blanket. 

“I need you to call Diana.”

“Alrighty.” A second later and the car was dialing. A few more to connect.

“Yes, Batman?” The Amazon’s pleasant voice filled the car.

“Come to these coordinates, inside there will be a vat filled with colorful toxins, don’t spill any. You need to bring it to these coordinates, I will be stationed there. If you think it would be too heavy to carry in one run, call me and I will arrive at the first coordinates in around half an hour.”

“Is that all?”

“Yes, I will see you soon.” The call was cut off.

“Why not call Superman?” Tim asked.

Bruce studied Wally’s features. He looked different without his usual longish hair. A shame. Bruce would admit that he was attracted to the way Wally's hair flopped over his forehead. If he pretended, he could still feel the way his chest felt when he tucked the silky hair behind Wally's freckled ears. “Harley Quinn threw the Bat-suit along with the utility belt into a vat of acid. The piece of kryptonite that was originally covered by its pocket is probably now mixed in with the other chemicals.”

“Ah,” Tim said.

The rest of the drive was silent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm more familiar with Bio, rather than Chemistry, so I apologize if any terms I used were strange.  
> If you catch any mistakes, don't be afraid to point them out so I can set them on fire.


	3. Normal Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Acts of crime don't pay and unfortunately for Flash, the darling of Central City, acts of heroic deeds don't pay much either.  
> That isn't to say he would turn to crime, but Wally is going to have to pay more attention to maintaining his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flash and Batman duke it out.  
> I have the romantic skills of a 12 year old. There was like 4000 words, but then I deleted them all and wrote 1500 in about 5 hours.

It was raining outside.

Wally gradually came to his senses. The blankets noticeably pressed on his chest.

He opened his eyes and immediately shut them after a wave of pain exploded from his head. Wally groaned. He vaguely remembered being upside down for some reason and…candy apples?

And.

And something sighed next to him.

Wally would have screamed, but a hand slapped on his mouth and its fingers held on tight to his jaw before he could make a sound. The covers were tucked in tight and it should _not_ take the ‘Fastest Man Alive’ that long to free his limbs from a few layers of cloth. The intruder shrugged off his grip.

“Flash, it’s Batman.” Strange. It sounded like the Bruce guy from before. Maybe…

Wally smiled at the darkness. “Bruce, huh? I guess it fits. What with you being all buff n’ stuff.”

Bats didn’t respond.

His smile grew wider. “Or did you come back for the monthly quickie?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Fuckin Batman. He knew what Wally was talking about.

“The Bruce thing or the…you know. Shaking the sheets, grand slam, breakin’ wood, and I’m embarrassing myself. Just forget the last sentence.”

Batman gave a slight smile in spite of himself. “Why would you be embarrassing yourself?”

“No, I mean the second to last sentence.”

“Jiggling sheets.” He never wanted to hear Batman say ‘jiggling’ ever again. Ever.

“I’m calling you Bruce from now on. It’s much easier to say than Batman, which is one more syllable than easy.”

“Hmm.”

Wally reached for the lamp beside the bed but found that it wouldn’t turn on. He could barely see the light bulb lying next to it.

“You know it’s kind of illegal to break and enter in someone’s home? I thought I locked the windows last night.” He screwed in the light bulb but didn’t flick it on.

“I’ve entered your room many times before. This time I went through the door. It was unlocked.”

“By you?”  

“Before you detract me again, I think the more important question is, why didn't you stay at the Watchtower?” Way to kill the light, Batman. At least he didn’t deny the door thing.

“Well, sorry Mother Gotham. I was trying to help you guys. You guys called for help, remember?”

“We called for J’onn’s help. You were supposed to be protecting the tower. What if something attacked the station? There would be nothing to defend it against enemies.” His dick was never hard in the first place, but somehow he felt really turned off.

“Oh, I would do _so_ much against an extra-terrestrial attack and running is sure effective against space missiles.  I think the better question is, why are you so dead set in denying my help?”

Batman loomed over him until he could only see the darkness. Should’ve turned on the lights.

“You are being given a rest from high-risk missions. Your help was not needed at the time, we had it under control. J’onn was needed for his telepathic abilities. When you tagged along, it resulted in your kidnapping by two Arkham escapees. Murderers, Flash.”

Batman always had to be right. It tired Wally, always being the dumb, ignorant guy.

“If I can recall correctly, you were captured too, Batman.”

“I did it to rescue you. You would be liquid at the bottom of a pool of acid if I hadn’t allowed myself to get taken.” Of course.

“I thought she needed-“

“Enough, this is a waste of time. You’re too gullible,” Wally flinched, “and trusting of anything that moves around you. Your bullheadedness gets you hurt and it causes you to make stupid decisions. Your actions are proving my point.” Wally was shaking by now, buzzing angrily in place.

Batman leaned back. “Don’t bother coming for a next mission, seeing as how it’s beneath you to pay attention to meetings. You can come back when I see that you’re ready to follow given orders.”

He didn’t chase after Batman when he turned around to exit the bedroom, cape swishing dramatically like some kind of warlord.

Batman stopped at the doorway. “And while we’re at it, I’d strongly advise you to find another job. Working under Luthor isn’t the best way to keep a secret identity. I might develop an urge to remove you from that occupation if it gets too much.”

Batman had this thing. This thing where he would beat the person down, kick them in the nuts, or ovaries if it was a girl, and then spit words that pierced like arrows.

Fire. He saw fire. No. That was it.

Wally leaped at Batman and brought him down, Kevlar suit and all, onto his stomach. “Who do you think you are, controlling and messing up my life?” Wally hissed into the place where Batman’s ear was supposed to be.

Great idea Wallster, tackle the guy who can torture a person 51 different ways with a bent paperclip.

“Wally, I think you need to get off me,” Batman said, glaring at him with one lens from the floor.

Wally froze after hearing his name. And then was flipped onto his back and held down by a fucking truck. Or at least it felt like it. His head bumped against the carpet giving him the lite version of carpet burn. The people living below him were probably wondering what the hell was going on.

Batman’s hands gripped on Wally’s wrists and kept them above his head. He was squatting over Wally so that Batman’s legs held down his legs like over the top restraints. The knees squeezed at his hips.

“Haha, I get it. I scratch your back, you knife mine. Now get off of me.” His headache was reminding Wally that it still happened to exist. He had to bite his lips to prevent himself from groaning in pain.

Batman wasn’t saying anything. Just looking down at him. Or more like a part of him.

“Bats?” Batman was slowly leaning down.

“May I kiss you?” Batman asked abruptly. He must have been looking at his lips.

Way too sudden.

“Are you jo--”

A tongue pushed in at Wally’s “o”. He released a groan inside Batman’s mouth, more pleasure, and surprise filled than pain. Batman slipped out of his mouth. That was way too quick, even for him. Somehow Wally just realized that he was only wearing a tank and boxers. And that they were fighting a minute ago.

“Batman, what on--”

Batman suddenly got off of him and dragged him into standing up and walking towards his bed. “You need to sleep. You had a long night and it’s already morning.”  

Wally blew air out from his mouth and used his super speed to slam Batman onto his bed. His hands were almost cradling the sides of Batman’s head.

They stared at each other, not moving. Seconds were hours. Only Wally was breathing hard.

Then they started talking at the same time: “Are we going to fuck or…”, “I realize that I made you angry…”

It was silent again.

Batman broke the silence first. “I admit that I was going overboard by preventing you from exercising the right to your civilian life. That wasn’t my intention. I only meant to talk about you leaving the Watchtower--”

He grasped Wally’s arm when he tried to say something. “No, listen to me first.” Batman waited for a few seconds to see if the speedster would try anything. After seeing that he wouldn’t be interrupted, he continued.

“You were caught by the Joker and then let go for reasons I don’t know right now. It’s out of Joker’s character to do that and I suspect that Luthor has his hands in this. You’re planning to become a chemical engineer at Grand Hearts Lab located in Metropolis.”

“How did you…Cause your Batman, right?”

“LexCorp is involved with biochemistry. Superman and I have reasons to believe that Luthor might start getting heavily invested in that branch. I’d rather not you be near him.”

Wally shifted his weight, on one hand, to place the other on top of Batman’s mouth. Teeth and slight tongue nipped at the skin on his palm. “Can you just say sorry?”

“No.” Of course.

“This went kinda sour,” Wally said, laying down on Batman’s chest. The armor plates were cold against his cheek.

He felt the short hum vibrate into his ears. Like a giant cat. Cat-man.

“I had a really bad headache. It got worse after you flipped me like your life depended on it.”

Batman lifted a gauntlet and started to sift through Wally’s hair, checking for injuries. It rested on the base of his neck a few moments after. It felt cool, diverting the hot energy away from his head.

“A habit. I made sure to lessen the impact.”

The hand prevented him from getting up. “You have a violent and wrong habit. Can I call start calling you Bruce?”

“I’m Batman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't found out yet, I edited the shit out of the first two chapters. Now they are less bad (in my eyes).  
> They were supposed to like each other, but then they ended up beating each other.  
> Ended too suddenly for me. Will do something later.


End file.
